Aiming for a September 1st release date for the High Achievers ep. My 40th birthday. Seems fitting. Mixing is lined up to be done if I can finalize songs this week. Exciting!
Just got another mix back for a song called Souvenirs. Caleb Stull, who mixed it, added some fantastic backing vocals. I’m really happy with it.
I’ll be sending out a release notice. If want to be on the list, email me shanesparks [ at ] shaw.ca or just follow me on twitter @sm_sparks
I finished writing the last song for the EP yesterday (it’s called High Achievers, Part II). It’s all coming together in a really cool way. Different than what I was expecting. The whole feeling of the album is what I wanted to get out there. To describe this persistent, nagging feelings of not being good enough. Of failing to meet the standard. Of not being beautiful enough or successful enough, or worth enough. The malaise.
Last night I played the final song for my wife Jess and she said “god, you are so depressed.” But I’m not. Or not any more than normal. I explained that the songs aren’t about me, so much as a collective “me”, which includes you.
The way I think about it is there are so many forces that want to make you feel shitty. That PROFIT off you feeling shitty about yourself – people, products, corporations that win because you feel inadequate. When you are young you can sort of defer the bad feeling because life is full of potential. And then you get to be in middle of it, and you realize, I haven’t met my potential, whatever that is. I didn’t do/accomplish/become the things I thought I would. I’m not measuring up. And it hangs there like a bad smell, surrounding you.
So High Achievers is about that feeling. Hopefully you’ll get it.
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Here’s a live acoustic version of the song “Chase The Fall” that appears on the Broken Lovers album. I was never that happy with the album version of this song. It came out a little too pouty and the drums feel too “big” for the song. It was the last song I wrote for the album just before I started recording, and in retrospect, the song didn’t quite mature into the song I wanted it to be.
I don’t know if this version is better, but it’s different. (And it is what I really sing like, unaided by various production trickery.)
I like the idea of themes, that things string together in a semi-cohesive way. I don’t know why. I don’t really care to examine it other than I find it more interesting to do it that way. So “High Achievers” – call it my “mid life whimsy” angst album – is going to be an EP. I think there’s enough juice in this topic to warrant 5 songs. An EP feels good.
I got a rough mix back of “seagulls” and it sounds so so good. Caleb Stull, who’s mixing it, is so awesome. There’s some alchemy is getting the frequencies just so. It feels like such a relief when you send something out and it comes back better than you expected. Just working on the last song, High Achievers, Part II. It’s got a bit of Broken Social Scene/Bon Iver vibe going. Lot’s of space, a bit noisy. Actually the whole thing is a bit noisier than I was expecting. But noisy is awesome, so I’ll take it.
I figure it will be done maybe mid-September. Upon release I expect great fanfare from you. Inside I respond well to praise, though on the outside I may wince.
Had a new song emerge fast and furious over the last few days. My favorite lines on the album so far are:
souvenirs of all our /
treacherous past glories
souvenirs of all these /
boring stories
This is a mid-life angst album, after all.
My kids wander down to my studio, mostly out of boredom but a little curious about what I do for hours down there. I’ve been trying to teach them about the process of making something. Show them how tracks are organized, how I’ll do several takes of something to get it right, how it comes together, how creating anything is not a quick process. I hope they are learning from it. I hope they find something creative they like to do. Something to feed their soul.
My 10 year old daughter asked me: Why are you doing this daddy, no one is going to BUY your album. Because it’s fun to make things, I told her. As a souvenir. And that’s mostly the damn truth, kid.
© 2011 Faith, My Atheist Love
